When she made her debut as the spoiled (but sweet) Eastland student Blair Warner on The Facts of Life, Lisa Whelchel was just 16 years old. Now, nearly 50 years since the classic sitcom premiered, the 62-year-old actress has learned a lot about how to "take the good" and "take the bad" — especially when it comes to raising kids.
In a video shared to TikTok this week, Whelchel, who is now a mother of three adult children, appeared on her 33-year-old daughter Haven Weits' popular podcast, Haven!, to talk about her experiences as a mom.
"You do so much with your kids, I really admire the way you parent," Whelchel told her daughter, adding, "I've learned a lot. And I've, you know, really had to negotiate my own relationship with regret by watching you as a parent and realize, you know, the truth is — let me just say to any parents out there, young or old — you will do it wrong. You will be proven wrong, all the way."
@haventhepodcastNo matter what - you will get it wrong as a parent. If you’re super safe & structured… you weren’t permissive of emotions enough If you allowed emotions… you weren’t structured enough There is no way to get it right all the time. It sounds like a downer but it’s actually kind of freeing - we are doing the best we can, and when (not if!) we miss the mark… well, we can acknowledge, apologize, & do better next time.
♬ original sound - Haven! Podcast"Whether you are, you know, safe and structured, then they were not allowed to express their feelings enough," Whelchel continued. "If they're allowed to express their feelings, then you weren't, you know, structured enough. So there is no doing this right."
The former teen star went on to note that "thankfully, there's so much more available now" to parents in terms of guidance and resources.
"There's so much wisdom and so much just awareness and intention around parenting," she said. "And had I had that, I think I would have loved it and I would have implemented those things. I didn't, and I regret that. I didn't have it available. But I do have to be careful not to beat myself up for the mistakes that I made and the regrets that I had. We're all doing the best we can."
Fans in the comments loved hearing Whelchel's honest take on child-rearing.
"This is so true. You're just doing the best you can at the time," one person wrote, with a second agreeing, "You just want to raise good decent people."
"She is my mom mentor," someone else gushed, with another adding, "I love this."
Others couldn't get over Whelchel's appearance, raving, "She is still so beautiful," and "She looks great!!!"
In a 2023 interview with Yahoo! Entertainment, Whelchel — who's written ten books on parenting, child discipline, friendships and faith — opened up about what it was like growing up on TV, admitting that dealing with constant feedback about her appearance (among other things) was "a lot."
"Though even back then I understood it's a business," she explained, adding, "They hired me to play a certain character that looked a certain way. And it was also really, really hard because I was going through puberty and my parents were going through a divorce and I was living in California and they were in Texas, so there was emotional eating involved. All the things that are not atypical of teenage girls. But I think everybody was doing the best they could back then. And as Maya Angelou said: 'When you know better, you do better.'"
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