Is It Ever OK To Ghost Someone? Psychologists Weigh In ...Saudi Arabia

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Is It Ever OK To Ghost Someone? Psychologists Weigh In

Falling in love is like nothing else. It's butterflies in your stomach, smiles for no reason, and the quiet thrill of discovering someone new who sees you in a way no one else does. But sometimes, as magical as it starts, that feeling doesn’t always go both ways. And when love turns out to be one-sided, it can sting in a way that’s hard to put into words. These days, instead of having the difficult—but human—conversation that comes with letting someone down gently, more and more people are choosing to simply vanish. No calls. No texts. No goodbye. Which brings up a very real and very timely question: Is it ever OK to ghost someone?To answer that question, we reached out to psychologists Dr. Patricia Dixon and Dr. Stephanie Carinia, both of whom specialize in relationships and human behavior.  Through their expert perspective, they help us understand the complexities of ghosting and offer thoughtful insight into when—if ever—that action might be considered acceptable. Plus they shed light on what ghosting reveals about the way people navigate modern-day connections, communication and emotional responsibility.So, if you’ve ever been ghosted, have ghosted someone or are considering ghosting someone, you may be surprised to see what the psychologists have to say. Related: Is 'No Response' Actually a Response? How To Know, According to an Etiquette Expert

“Ghosting is generally considered an unconstructive and disrespectful way of ending a relationship,” Dr. Carinia explains. “Communicating openly is typically a healthier approach.”Dr. Dixon agrees and adds, “Ghosting someone is generally frowned upon because, at its core, it’s just plain rude. It’s a form of avoidance that can feel dismissive and hurtful, especially when you’ve shared moments or built a connection with someone. When you suddenly disappear without any explanation, it leaves the other person hanging—wondering what went wrong, if they did something to upset you, or if they’re okay. It’s not just about the silence; it’s about the message that silence sends."Related: 11 Best Phrases To Use When Canceling Plans, According to Etiquette Experts

    When Is It Not OK to Ghost Someone?

    Both psychologists share some scenarios in which it's definitely *not* OK to ghost someone.

    According to Dr. Dixon, it’s not OK to ghost someone who you have been together with for a long period of time. “Ghosting in a serious relationship can cause confusion, hurt and a lack of closure,” she points out. “It’s unfair to leave someone wondering what went wrong or feeling discarded without giving them the respect of a conversation. Open communication, even if difficult, helps both people understand and grow from.”Related: The Common Dating Habit a Relationship Therapist Is Begging You To Stop in 2025

    When You Have a Professional or Business Relationship

    Ghosting doesn’t just happen in romantic relationships—it can happen in professional ones too. “If you’re working with someone and you decide to cut ties or end the relationship, it’s not OK to do so by ghosting them,” Dr. Dixon says. “Ghosting in professional settings can be seen as unprofessional and disrespectful. Clear communication, on the other hand, helps maintain your reputation and ensures a smooth transition without leaving the other person feeling undervalued or abandoned.”

    While some people ghost their significant other as a way to break up with them, Dr. Dixon shares that some people ghost their former partner after they split up. “When someone reaches out and asks for clarification or closure after a breakup, it’s not OK to ghost them,” she explains. “In this scenario, they are seeking understanding and closure. Ignoring their questions or avoiding a conversation can deepen their pain and unresolved feelings. While you’re not obligated to re-engage if you’re not comfortable, politely explaining your reasons or setting boundaries is more respectful than ghosting. It shows consideration for their emotional process.”

    If Someone Has Been a Close Friend or Family Member

    When you’ve been tight with someone throughout your life and consider them a friend, or they are part of your family, our experts tell Parade that ghosting them shouldn’t be something you consider doing.“Ghosting someone you care about can cause lasting hurt and damage relationships that might have otherwise been salvageable,” Dr. Dixon shares. “If you need space or distance from them, it’s healthier to communicate honestly about your feelings or boundaries rather than disappearing completely. This approach fosters respect and leaves the door open for future reconciliation if appropriate.”Dr. Carinia agrees, adding, “Ghosting a family member—especially during times of crisis, such as illness or personal struggles—can lead to deep emotional scars and familial rifts. Family relationships often require open communication to address issues and provide support. Ignoring or avoiding family members can exacerbate misunderstandings and create long-lasting damage in family bonds.”Related: Parents and Grandparents Should Look Out for These 11 Signs of Loneliness in Loved Ones

    While ghosting is typically not something that is praised, our experts say that it’s not always a bad thing. In fact, they agree that when it comes to matters of safety and mental health, ghosting is considered OK and should not be something you feel guilty about doing.“Safety concerns and social dynamics allow some exceptions to this rule,” Dr. Carinia tells Parade.“In situations where someone is dealing with violence or abuse—whether emotional or physical—ghosting can actually be a lifesaver,” Dr. Dixon adds. “When your safety is at risk, sometimes there’s no time for a conversation or a goodbye; you have to act quickly to get away and protect yourself. In those moments, ghosting isn’t about being rude or avoiding feelings—it’s about staying alive and starting over somewhere safe. It’s a heartbreaking reality, but sometimes, it’s the only way to truly escape danger and ensure your safety.”

    When Is It Acceptable to Ghost Someone? 

    Remember: There are times when it's more than OK to ghost someone. Here's what psychologists want you to keep in mind.

    “Sometimes ghosting helps you to maintain your personal boundaries, like protecting your mental health, and to move forward without unnecessary conflict,” Dr. Carinia states. “If a friend consistently engages in behavior that negatively affects you—such as constant criticism, manipulative tactics or draining emotional demands—so if they don’t respect your needs and your boundaries, you need to. When distancing yourself a bit and or communicating this to them and there’s still no change, ghosting may be warranted.”Related: 10 Manipulative Tactics Straight Out of a Gaslighter’s Playbook, According to Psychologists

    When Someone Is Stalking You

    “If you've been on a few dates and clearly communicate that you’re not interested in continuing, but the other person keeps contacting you, ghosting can be a way to assert boundaries,” Dr. Carinia notes. “It also simply may be the only way to end it when the other person perceives any reaction from your side as an invitation for connection rather than a boundary. An extreme example could be when dealing with a stalker.”

    “Sometimes, words don’t work, and walking away silently is the healthiest way to prioritize your peace and start healing without engaging in ongoing conflict or frustration,” Dr. Dixon tells Parade. “For instance, if someone persistently disrespects your boundaries and makes you feel undervalued or unsafe, ghosting can be a necessary step to protect your emotional well-being.”Related: 35 Phrases To Set Boundaries Firmly and Fairly, According to Mental Health Pros

    When You're in an Abusive or Dangerous Situation

    Dr. Carinia tells Parade that one instance where ghosting isn’t looked down on is when it comes to toxic and abusive relationships or scary circumstances. “For example, a woman may want to confront a man, but she may be afraid of how he will react or she might even be afraid that sending a text message could trigger him, so she may ghost him as a result,” Dr. Carinia reveals. “In situations where a woman feels uncomfortable or threatened, ghosting may be seen as a protective measure to remove herself from an unwanted or potentially dangerous situation without confrontation and be acceptable.”

    “Ghosting is acceptable when it’s done as a way to establish clear boundaries and protect your mental, physical and emotional health,” Dr. Dixon stresses. "For instance, you shouldn’t feel guilty for ghosting someone after a relationship or friendship has ended if the other person refuses to accept the breakup despite your efforts to set boundaries and they continue to send unwanted texts, show up unannounced or invade your personal space. In this case, ghosting is a way to establish clear boundaries and protect yourself in a silent, firm way to communicate that you want no further contact and need to be left alone for your safety and peace of mind. Otherwise, if you engage in direct confrontation, it might escalate the situation or provoke further harassment, especially if the person refuses to respect your wishes.”

    There are also some ways you can stop talking to someone without ghosting them.

    Have an Honest Conversation

    “This works because it shows respect for the other person’s feelings and provides clarity, reducing confusion and leaving the door open for a respectful ending,” Dr. Dixon explains.Dr. Carinia adds, “You can express that you feel the relationship isn’t working for you or that you need some space. This direct approach gives the other person clarity and allows for respectful closure.”She notes you can go about this by saying something like, “I want to say that I really appreciate the time we’ve spent together—at the same time, I’ve noticed that I don’t feel like continuing to hang out. It’s unfortunate since I like and respect you as a person, that’s also the reason that I’m communicating this openly to you. I’m not sure how you feel about this, or what your thoughts are.”She says it’s important after you speak to let the other person respond. “Doing so can help with their process for closure, allowing them to be upset since that’s a perfectly healthy reaction that helps them deal with the new reality.”

    “This is another option because it shows you’re being honest about your needs without completely cutting the person off abruptly, allowing for a smoother transition,” Dr. Dixon shares.“If you want to gradually reduce contact, you might say something like, ‘I’ve been feeling overwhelmed and need some time for myself. I might not be as responsive for a while, but I appreciate your understanding.’”

    Gradually Decrease Contact

    “This subtle approach signals your desire for less interaction without a confrontational or abrupt end, giving the other person time to understand your boundaries,” Dr. Dixon tells Parade.“You can gradually decrease your contact by starting to reply less frequently, keeping your responses brief, and avoid initiating conversations, all while maintaining polite and respectful communication,” she explains. “This is a softer, fade out approach that helps the person see it coming, which leads to the opportunity for a conversation. This subtle approach also signals your desire for less interaction without a confrontational or abrupt end, giving the other person time to understand your boundaries.”

    Up Next:

    Related: Why Therapists Are Begging People To Stop 'Dry Texting'

    Sources:

    Dr. Patricia Dixon, psychologistDr. Stephanie Carinia, psychologist

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