The Golden Bachelorette star Joan Vassos has no immediate plans to move in with fiancé Chock Chapple. Despite him being her final pick at the end of the ABC reality show last fall, and despite their intentions to marry, they're each staying put in their respective cities (she lives in Rockville, Md., and he lives in Wichita, Kan.) until they find the perfect place to relocate together in New York.
"Everybody looks at this like .... 'There's no way this can work because you're not together every minute,'" Joan, 62, exclusively tells Parade. "We don't feel the same way about it. We feel like we both have pretty rich lives in our 60s. You find somebody [at that time of life], chances are they have stuff going on. They have family or they have jobs or they have friend groups, or they have hobbies. So you might not need to spend every waking moment together or you might not need to live in the same city, and that's how we feel right now about it."
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She goes on to say that she and Chock each get to visit the other when there's "something fun happening" in their respective hometowns. "He had a party at his country club on Friday night. We had a blast. I loved being there," she explains.
Likewise, they'll often meet up in New York — where they're currently house-hunting — or even on a trip to, say, Cancun. "We're not living with each other, but we're kind of living our best lives," Joan says. "We get to travel and do all the fun things and be together for those, and then the mundane things of, like, me babysitting my grandkids and him going to work — he's kind of doing it by himself, which I don't need to be there [for], and he certainly doesn't want to be here with me babysitting my grandkids or taking my mom to the doctor or whatever."
Related: Joan Vassos Gives Update on Wedding Planning
To find love again on The Golden Bachelorette, Vassos had to overcome feeling guilty about the memory of her late husband, John Vassos. The father of her four grown children died of pancreatic cancer in January 2021.
This past Valentine's Day, six years to the day since her late husband's diagnosis, Joan was named ambassador for the Pancreatic Cancer Action Network (PanCAN)'s PurpleStride, the ultimate walk to end pancreatic cancer taking place April 26 with her team "It’s Just a Sprain" (for the Washington, D.C., location).
"We wanted to do something that [John] would have liked, to honor his memory, and when I got presented with this opportunity, I thought, 'This is exactly what he would want.' He would want to help other people," Joan tells Parade. "John gave to everyone. I mean, if you could see the checks in his checkbook. From after he passed away, I had the ledger, and it was just to Boys & Girls Clubs. It was to people that he knew that needed money."
Although it has been difficult for her to move on from her marriage, she says she knows her late husband would want her to be happy. "John actually told me, 'I want you to find somebody else. I want you to still have a life. You're young, you deserve a future,'" she shares. "And I know that's true. It still feels really weird, but I know he's happy for me."
Joan previously told Parade that she and Chock have put their wedding plans on hold due to busy schedules.
"I don't think we'll be engaged forever. I wanna marry Chock," she adds now. "It's honestly — our journey is a little weird. ... We are doing the dating process backwards, so I feel like we have a little time of just like, we're having fun dating and not having a million things we have to do."Plus, she says, "We don't have biological clocks. We've done all of that, so there's no rush to get married. So, you know, whenever it feels right, it'll feel right and we could probably throw it together fairly quickly. We don't need this big extravagant thing that you do when you're younger."
To register for PanCan's Purple Stride or to make a donation, click here.
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