Christmas is expensive and exhausting – I want to spend it alone ...Middle East

DEAR DEIDRE: CHRISTMAS is filling me with dread. 

I want to escape from it all and go somewhere alone to enjoy myself, instead of cooking and cleaning for everyone else.

I’m 58 and my husband is 60. We have three grown-up children, who are coming home for the holiday period.

I’m sick of spending all my savings on presents and food. It’s all so expensive and exhausting.

My family expects me to run around for them, but I deserve some fun too.

I want to escape. My sister is going away for Christmas, and I envy her so much.

I’ve realised I had my children too young and never got to experience the world for myself before all the responsibility.

I feel so unfulfilled and stuck, and know that at my age, this is my lot in life. Things are never going to improve. 

How can I stop feeling so fed up?

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DEIDRE SAYS: You sound very low and dejected.

But it’s not too late to change things.

Christmas is not meant to be a trial. If you want it to be different this year, you need to talk to your husband and children and ask them to chip in – both with cash and practical help.

Once it’s over, think about taking up a new hobby or volunteering, so you’ll get out, meet new people and learn new skills.

If you think you might be depressed, make an appointment with your GP and see my support pack on Depression.

Get in touch with the Dear Deidre team

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Fill out and submit our easy-to-use and confidential form and the Dear Deidre team will get back to you.

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