TEARS streamed down her face as Sarah Dalgleish’s husband repeated the words that broke her heart: “I’m having an online affair.”
After 16 years of marriage, Sarah, 62, was still madly in love with retired sales manager Clive, 67.
PacemakerSarah Dalgleish was left heartbroken by her husband Clive’s online affair – but he was actually a victim[/caption] SWNSClive and Sarah in happier times on their wedding day[/caption]But his admission of adultery was not only the start of the once-happy couple’s separation, but the revelation that his new romance was nothing of the sort. Clive was being scammed.
It was the beginning of a nightmare that would lead the couple to separate and leave Clive – who’d been conned out of £2,000 – under a mountain of debt.
The man Sarah thought was her knight in shining armour is a victim of a Facebook romance fraud, a crime that has risen by 27 per cent in the past five years, according to Action Fraud.
Sarah, an administrator from Belfast, Northern Ireland, says: “We were happy together and I thought we’d be together for the rest of our lives.
“We first met in the late Nineties as good friends and neighbours, both of us in relationships. But we reunited after Clive found me on Friends Reunited in 2009 and we were single.
“The following year we had the most amazing wedding and I never once questioned my husband’s fidelity.
“He was thoughtful in every way and always treated me like a princess.”
Their relationship remained happy until January, when Sarah noticed an unexpected change had been made to the settings of a bank account they shared.
“I asked Clive why he had changed the minimum payment on our credit card,” says Sarah.
“Nothing could have prepared me for his response. ‘I’ve been having an affair with a woman in America, Sarah,’ he blurted out.
“I was bewildered and confused – I didn’t burst into tears, because I couldn’t even understand it at first.
“I was firing so many questions at him. Had he met her? Had they had sex?
“He sat there with his head down and admitted she had contacted him, out of the blue, on Facebook Messenger three months earlier, claiming to be a fellow fan of his favourite football team, Wigan Athletic.
“My head spun. In those three months, life had gone on as usual. We hosted our family for Christmas dinner and he would tell me he loved me, daily, before we went to sleep.”
12-WEEK AFFAIR
Much to her disbelief, Clive told Sarah that over the course of their 12-week affair, he had fallen in love with the woman, ‘Sophie’ – without ever speaking to her on the phone.
“He revealed he had been romantically messaging and flirting with her on Facebook, and then it moved to email and other messaging apps, daily,” says Sarah.
“As they had never met, I realised straight away, with a jolt, that it was a scam. Then Clive admitted he had sent her approximately £2,000 in gift cards.
“I told him: ‘This is the kind of scam we watch programmes about on TV.’ But Clive still thought she was real.
“I had the devastation of my marriage being over, but on top of that I was crying and yelling, trying to convince Clive he was being scammed.
“He was in complete denial, totally emotionless.”
SuppliedClive’s supposed online lover told him she needed money via Apple gift cards for her unwell grandmother’s medical bills[/caption] SuppliedClive telling ‘Sophie’ that he has loves her during the 12-week affair[/caption]Nothing Sarah said could convince Clive he was the unwitting victim of a con.
“I was trying to make him see his error and said to him: ‘If I thought she was a real person, I’d pay for you to go there right now, but there will be nobody to meet you there and if there is, it won’t be her and they’ll rob you for blind and leave you for dead,’” she says.
“Sixteen years of marriage, with romantic holidays, surprise birthday trips and shared friends – all gone over someone he never even met and, I was betting, never even existed.”
Clive’s supposed online lover claimed to be from Washington DC and in her early thirties and sent pictures of herself to him. She told him she needed money for her unwell grandmother’s medical bills, telling him that Apple gift cards were the best way to send it.
“She alleged she didn’t have a bank account after being scammed previously,” says Sarah.
“I tried to get to the bottom of why he believed it, but any questions I asked, I didn’t get much back.
“I knew my money was safe, because it was only his money in there. I just had access to the account.
FAKE LOVER
“After the initial bombshell, my mind was mush. I left the house, gathered my thoughts and came home a few hours later.
“We continued to live under the same roof, but separately. It was very sad.”
The couple are not alone in this nightmare, Action Fraud says that in the past year, a staggering £92,215,871 has been taken from victims, with data from Lloyds Bank revealing those aged 65 to 74 lose the most money.
In shock, Sarah went into investigative mode.
“I made it my mission to find out what had happened,” she says.
“I even discovered, ten days later, a piece of paper with flight information scrawled on it. Clive had been to a travel agent inquiring about flying to Washington to meet her.
“In a bid to convince Clive of the scam, I made a Facebook profile and contacted ‘Sophie’.
“Within 10 minutes she had started asking me for money because she was ‘very poor’ and didn’t work. There was no mention of granny in hospital.
“I kept the chat going for five days to gather information, before I told her she was destroying lives and to go to hell.
“I wanted to show Clive, so he would acknowledge what was going on.
“Two weeks later, I saw a story about a scammer on Good Morning Britain.
I kept the chat going for five days to gather information, before I told her she was destroying lives and to go to hell.
Sarah“Clive and I watched it together in silence. It was a carbon copy of what happened to him.
“He began crying, because he realised his love interest was no more.”‘Sophie’ was actually impersonating a real London-based glamour model called Sophie Dalzell, who had nothing to do with the scam at all.
How to spot a romance scam
TO stop people falling victim to romance scams, police revealed the signs to look out for to help spot the scammers.
PROTECT YOUR INFO
Be wary of giving out personal information on a website or chatroom. Fraudsters will quickly contact you, often showing you glamorous photos of themselves and gaining your trust.
VAGUE INFO
A fraudster will make conversation more personal to get information out of you, but won’t tell you much about themselves that you can check or verify.
HIGH FLYERS
Romance fraudsters often claim to have high ranking roles that keep them away from home for a long time. This could be a ploy to deter your suspicions around not meeting in person.
DODGY SITES
Fraudsters will usually attempt to steer you away from chatting on a legitimate dating site that can be monitored. Stay on the platform that you started using initially, rather than switching to email, text or phone.
SOB STORIES
A fraudster may tell stories to target your emotions and get you to give them money.
They may claim they have an ill relative or are stranded in a country they don’t want to be in.
They may not ask you directly for money, hoping instead that you’ll offer it out of the goodness of your heart. Do not do this.
PRICEY PRESENTS
Sometimes the fraudsters will send the victim valuable items such as laptops, computers and mobile phones, asking them to resend them elsewhere.
They will invent a reason as to why they need the goods sent, but this may just be a way for them to cover up their criminal activity.
Alternatively they may ask a victim to buy the goods themselves and send them elsewhere.
MONEY PLOYS
Often, they will ask victims to accept money into their bank account and then transfer it to someone else using bank accounts, MoneyGram, Western Union, iTunes vouchers or other gift cards.
These scenarios are very likely to be forms of money laundering and you could be committing a criminal offence.
Source: Sussex Police
Sarah says: “After more digging, we found the real Sophie’s profile. She was an actual woman, but not the person Clive had been speaking to.”
Sarah and his family contacted the bank, but were unable to claim back the money spent as it was used to purchase gift cards which were redeemed.
“I even went to our local Curry’s to confront the manager, who said he had already suspected foul play and attempted to stop Clive,” says Sarah.
“Clive bought the gift cards on his credit card, so now has to find a way to pay it back as a retired man.”
Clive’s infidelity spelled the end of his and Sarah’s marriage. 13 weeks ago he moved out of the home they shared and back to his hometown of Portsmouth, Hampshire.
“He blew up our marriage for nothing,” says Sarah.
“Despite our differences, we both wish to raise awareness of the damage that scammers can do and how to spot them.”
SWNSClive’s infidelity spelled the end of his and Sarah’s marriage[/caption] SWNSSarah and his family contacted the bank, but were unable to claim back the money spent[/caption]Clive said: “’Sophie’ found me on Facebook and it developed from there.
“I researched this model and I knew she was from Manchester, but she told me she had moved to America because of her granny.
“She sold it to me that she was an ex-pornstar, but had settled down and worked in a restaurant.
“She sent me photos of her passport and her address. I did have doubts where I hunted for validity, but she would give it.
“I think I knew something was wrong, but some things you don’t want to believe.
I knew something was wrong, but some things you don’t want to believe.
Clive“I had never been unfaithful to Sarah and we had a good marriage as a whole, but we grew apart. I think that’s why I was vulnerable to this.
“I did say to Sophie that if I ever got caught, I’d have to tell my wife the truth about us because I couldn’t lie to Sarah. I believed Sophie and I would end up getting together further down the line.
“I’ve told Sarah many times how sorry I am, and I pray one day she will meet another man she can be truly happy with.
“There can’t be any going back because the trust has been broken.
“Sarah is a damn fine woman and she was a great wife. I wish the best for her.”
Detective Superintendent Gary Miles, speaking on behalf of Action Fraud, said: “Action Fraud can confirm that it received [this report] on 20th February 2025 and this is currently being assessed by the National Fraud Intelligence Bureau (NFIB) at the City of London Police.”
*The real Sophie Dalzell has been contacted for a comment. Read More Details
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