Emotional anchors in families appear cool as cucumbers, even if the heat is on high."If you are the emotional anchor in your family, you tend to be someone that does not get easily overwhelmed or emotionally flooded," Dr. Nelson says. "You are able to keep your cool and have likely developed some great grounding skills, like taking a deep breath or reminding yourself you can handle emotional distress."
Conflict is a part of life, but Dr. Nelson says that emotional anchors know how to navigate sticky moments gracefully."You have the ability to express yourself in words and specifically express your emotions in words," Dr. Nelson says. "This is something many people really struggle to do. You also have a way of getting your perspective across that others can connect with without getting defensive. You likely don’t use a lot of accusatory language and don’t jump to conclusions quickly."Related: 8 Habits To Start With Your Adult Kids That Will Transform Your Relationship, According to Psychologists
4. An ability to see and empathize with multiple perspectives
Helping others is important work, but it isn't without pitfalls."Emotional anchors frequently suppress their emotions to prioritize others, ensuring those around them meet their needs, even if it comes at a personal cost," says Dr. Carolina Estevez, Psy.D., a licensed clinical psychologist at Crestone Wellness.Dr. Lira de la Rosa also raised this flag."Emotional anchors may downplay their struggles or emotions to avoid burdening others," Dr. Lira de la Rosa says. "This is often rooted in their belief that their role is to support, not to seek support."6. Anticipating needs
Dr. Lira de la Rosa says emotional anchors are their family members' biggest fans."They frequently motivate and encourage family members to reach their potential," Dr. Lira de la Rosa says. "They see themselves as a source of inspiration and strength for others."Related: 16 Common Phrases Unhappy People Often Use Without Realizing It, Psychologists Say3 Tips for Emotional Anchors
1. Find your own anchor
Boundaries are vital for emotional anchors."Recognizing that you do not always have to be available is important," Dr. Estevez says. "For example, deciding not to respond to calls during personal downtime can give you the space to recharge."
self-care
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Sources:
Dr. Kayla Nelson, Psy.D., a clinical psychologist specializing in working with familiesDr. Ernesto Lira de la Rosa, Ph.D., a psychologist and Hope for Depression Research Foundation media advisorDr. Carolina Estevez, Psy.D., a licensed clinical psychologist at Crestone Wellness Read More Details
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