It’s time for The Apprentice to end ...Middle East

I’m an Apprentice apologist. Yes, it’s silly, self-important and heavily manipulated – the candidates are clearly set up to fail. But if you’re judging it as a personality-led reality show – at times even a comedy – rather than a straight business competition – it’s one of the funniest, silliest series on television. But the opening episode of this 19th series tests even my patience.  

It starts, as The Apprentice always does, with this year’s suited and booted candidates pulling their tiny suitcases through London, mouthing off about how they’re the toughest businessperson who have ever walked the planet.

One half of this year’s candidates: (back row, L-R) Jonny, Liam, Nadia, Jordan, Mia (front row, L-R) Amber-Rose, Frederick, Aoibheann and Emma S (Photo: BBC/FremantleMedia Ltd)

Next, the 18 fresh faces pile into the boardroom to meet their overlord and potential business partner Lord Sugar for the first time. He duly launches into his pre-written jokes, telling his candidates that their CVs have “got more rubbish in them than the Thames”. They all laugh along dutifully, but by this point I’m starting to get a bit bored.  

The Apprentice past winners - where are they now?

Repeating the same thing over and over again and expecting different results is a sign of madness. The Apprentice has been getting panned for years yet is still peddling out identical episodes. 

The mixed gender, unnamed teams made it hard to tell them apart (Photo: BBC/FremantleMedia Ltd)

Anyway, one team – led by Emma, who wants to “redefine coffee culture” – is tasked with creating a tour atop a glacier, promising stunning views of the Dolomites. The other team, under the management of pizzeria owner Anisa, must flog an e-bike ride through a forest complete with a lesson about… honey. No prizes for guessing who manages to sell the most tickets. 

Usually, I’m the first to defend The Apprentice, but this episode does nothing to help my case that it still deserves its place on TV. Repetitive, derivative and utterly out of touch with the modern world of work (at one point Lord Sugar takes the mick out of a candidate for taking a two-hour lunch: “next you’ll be asking me to work from home!”), I’m starting to think that it’s time The Apprentice handed in its resignation. 

‘The Apprentice’ continues next Thursday at 9pm on BBC One

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