The poor things simply cannot keep their cool if they’re in any way criticised or challenged; their egos are far too fragile, and they are unable to stop themselves from throwing their toys out of the pram, as we have seen this week.
Trump and Musk’s break-up has been so catty and below the belt that Real Housewives reality show boss Andy Cohen posted on social media, “LET ME HOST THE REUNION!”
Who would have thought it would come to this? (Rhetorical.) It all started so promisingly.
Their relationship progressed as those between 78 and 53-year-olds so typically do, with BFF sleepovers.
Obviously, there was a midnight feast – I mean, duh. “He’ll actually call, like, late at night and say, ‘Oh, by the way, make sure you get some ice cream from the kitchen’,” Musk gabbled, excitedly. “It was epic… This stuff is amazing. I ate a whole tub of it, added three pounds in one night.” No mention of prank calls or pillow fights, but again, the implication is surely there. Epic!
But there was trouble in paradise in April when Musk was such a meanie to one of Trump’s other mates, White House trade adviser Peter Navarro. He called Navarro “dumber than a sack of bricks”. Trump’s White House didn’t take sides: “Boys will be boys,” Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt said. Won’t they just.
Fittingly, the two overgrown toddlers began bickering over who said they didn’t want to play anymore first.
square AMERICA Every blow traded as Trump and Musk’s break-up went nuclear
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There must have been no one around to give them a ‘time out’ so they could sit and think about what they’d done, so the situation quickly escalated.
“You saw a man who was very happy when he stood behind the Oval desk. Even with a black eye. I said, Do you want a little makeup? He said, No, I don’t think so. Which is interesting,” Trump said. Anyone who has ever wanted to do face painting when their bestie didn’t could not fail to sympathise. Maybe Musk was worried Trump only had orange?
Things then got so nasty that mutual friend Kanye West took to social media to post, “Brooooos please nooooo… We love you both so much.” (Um, on this – oh, and everything else actually – speak for yourself, Ye.)
Never have two silly little boys needed their heads banged together more. Better form an orderly queue, eh?
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