This phrase is excellent for sharing your intentions and framing matters as a team effort, points out Dr. Catherine Hormats, Psy.D., a psychologist, psychoanalyst and Hope for Depression Research Foundation media advisor."Use it with people who have a history of being used, are skeptical or cynical or have trouble seeing a bigger picture," she suggests.Related: 7 Direct Phrases to Shut Down Passive-Aggressive Behavior, According to a Psychologist
2. "I hear what you’re saying, and I respectfully disagree."
Dr. Hormats shares that this line communicates your genuine preferences. However, the first part—about not challenging the person and wanting to remain authentic—softens the more direct ask that comes next, reducing the odds a person will feel defensive from the jump.She suggests using it when you're speaking to someone who is "suspicious, easily overwhelmed or generally feels unsafe when others differentiate themselves."
4. "I need more time to think about that."
This one is for you, eldest daughters, people-pleasers and boundary-adverse types."This is a phrase that you can use when someone makes a request that you cannot take on. It is simple and direct, and doesn't over-explain," Dr. Schiff shares. "You are drawing a boundary without getting defensive."Related: 6 Ways Being a People-Pleaser Can Ruin Your Relationships, According to Therapists
6. "No."
Dr. Schiff suggests using this phrase when you want to say no but are open to considering alternatives."It is non-confrontational, calm and gives the other person space to pivot and come up with something else," she says.
8. "I appreciate your offer, but I’m not interested."
Related: 11 Common Behaviors of Authentic People—and One Thing They *Never* Do, According to Therapists
10. "Let me stop you there."
In sports, timeouts don't mean "game over." The same is true for communication if you don't like where things are headed."This phrase is helpful when someone is overstepping, dominating or interrupting in a conversation," Dr. Schiff stresses. "It shows that you are not passive but can maintain professionalism. This can work well in a meeting in order to redirect or clarify."
12. "Please don’t interrupt me because it makes me feel disrespected."
Getting interrupted is disorienting. You can assertively let someone know how you really feel without one-upping their rude behavior."This phrase will likely be more effective than raising your voice to speak over the person who is interrupting you," Dr. Miller says. "It is essentially an 'I statement' where you share how the person’s behavior—interrupting you—makes you feel disrespected. This phrasing sets a clear boundary while reminding the other person that listening is a sign of respect."Related: An Etiquette Expert Is Begging People To Stop This 'Rude' Habit During Small Talk
What *Not* To Say When You Want To Sound Assertive but Not Rude
Related: 8 Genius Phrases To Shut Down Rude Comments, According to Psychologists
Sources:
Dr. Holly Schiff, Psy.D., a clinical psychologistDr. Catherine Hormats Psy.D., a psychologist, psychoanalyst and Hope for Depression Research Foundation media advisorDr. Jan Miller, Ph.D., licensed psychologist with Thriveworks Read More Details
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