There appear to be three certainties in life: death, taxes and Have I Got News for You. The BBC’s satirical panel show returned to our screens for its 69th run last month, a milestone that has been reached in no small part due to the contributions of regular captains Ian Hislop and Paul Merton. They may sit on opposing teams and have very different characters, but their dynamic has proved crucial to its success.
Paul: Spearmint Rhino. One of us was the act and the other one was the punter. Right. Real answer. It was a TV show called Etcetera. I was part of a cast of people who were doing a live sketch show based on the week’s news and Ian came in to do a serious interview piece.
Paul: Then it became Cheese and Crackers, but that felt like it was sort of…
Paul: Yeah, to the mental health community. So after that, we started doing this show.
Ian: I don’t do impressions.
Ian: And I thought, "Oh God, who’s this oik I’ve got landed with?"
Paul: And no experience in the last 35 years has changed that initial opinion.
Paul: No.
Paul: We haven’t remotely clicked. I shouldn’t give away the secrets but actually, when you watch Have I Got News for You, we’re in separate studios. They put the picture together in the edit suite. I’m usually in Southport and Ian is in Park Lane. That’s why you never see us sitting next to each other.
Paul: Do they not get on?
What qualities do you think each other brings to the show?
Ian: That is true.
So how would you describe your relationship?
Ian: Platonic. It used to be the other way around.
Paul: Punctuality. That’s high up on the list, I think. Ummm...
What is one another’s funniest moment from the show?
Ian: I’d have to say there have just been so many. It’s a constant flow. Spoilt for choice, infinite variety.
Paul: Constant flow, the sort of thing we associate with Thames Water… but because it’s essentially improvised, apart from the twit in the middle who’s reading the autocue, you don’t really remember any of it because you’re sort of making it up as you go along. And so therefore, by the end of the recording, you’ve got no idea what you’ve said. Actually watching the show would be purgatory for me.
Paul: I wouldn’t be allowed to say it here, for legal reasons.
Paul: Oh yes, that’s a good point. They’ve been going since the 1920s, they must be worth a few bob.
Ian: I was surprised when…
Ian: That was awful! Terrible show.
What have you learnt from one another, if anything?
Ian: Underrated.
Paul: Money.
Paul: Well, you see that’s where Ian’s wrong. He turns up on a Friday, but we record on a Thursday.
Paul: It’s 35, actually.
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