When words become buzzy, the true meaning can get lost in the sauce (see: gaslighting and narcissism). Seponara is clearing it up. First, anxiety is normal. "It's a normal stress response to many different situations in our lives," she says. Everyone experiences stress at some point. Anxiety is different. "While many individuals experience stress on a regular basis, afterward, they usually calm down and feel better," Seponara explains. "For the rest of us, anxiety becomes so overwhelming and unmanageable that it starts to affect our quality of life." She says that a deteriorating quality of life is a flag for anxiety. Though anxiety is different for everyone, it generally happens in four phases:
Avoidance of stimuli/safety behaviors
Heightened anxiety
8 Phrases To Calm Anxiety, According to a Therapist
Seponara says that affirmations or positive self-talk coping statements are incredibly helpful for managing anxiety. "A positive self-talk coping statement or affirmation is a short, powerful statement that allows you to consciously be in control of your thoughts and is carefully constructed to impact our daily lifestyle," she explainsUnsure where to begin? Here are the eight Seponara repeats to herself when her anxiety creeps into her head.
My brain is giving me the wrong signals. I am safe.I know how to cope. I trust myself.This feeling won't last forever.I accept this feeling.Thank you for this warning, but I am OK.I am a total badass. I got this.I have felt this way before, and nothing bad happened.I have a toolkit and will use it.View the original article to see embedded media.
Thoughts are more than things floating within our heads. They are incredibly profound. "When you say or think affirmations, they become thoughts that shape our reality," Seponara says. "It's important that we talk to ourselves differently in highly anxious situations to create a more compassionate and regulated mindset." The problem? Many people do the opposite. "A lot of what we normally say and think about ourselves can be negative, which does not create good experiences," she explains. "To truly change irrational thinking patterns, we must practice retraining our brain to think and speak in a positive way." In fact, Seponara says people can repeat these phrases to themselves preemptively—as in before anxious feelings arise. "It’s a great idea to get into the habit of using these phrases on a daily basis," she recommends. "As we practice this new skill, we begin to create new neural pathways in the brain that help our body begin to believe that it's OK to be scared, but it doesn’t always mean we're in danger."Related: 35 Phrases To Disarm Your Inner-Critic, According to Therapists
3 Other Therapist-Backed Ways To Cope With Anxiety
2. Find support
Seponara says a village is critical for people trying to cope with anxiety. "Sharing our thoughts and feelings with a trusted friend, family member or therapist can provide much-needed perspective and validation," she explains. "Sometimes, just knowing that we're not alone in our struggles can make a world of difference."
3. Deep breathing exercises
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