In April 2020, a former British Army officer less than a month from his 100th birthday, Captain Tom Moore, decided to help NHS Charities Together by walking 100 laps of his Bedfordshire garden, 10 laps of 27 yards every day. He hoped to raise £1,000, a modest target but no small challenge for a 99-year-old man reliant on a walking frame.
If we were uncomfortable that Captain Tom’s fundraising was necessary, we expiated that guilt with frenzied celebrations of his heroism: Michael Ball recorded “You’ll Never Walk Alone” (what else?) in his honour, he was appointed an honorary Colonel and in July 2020 he was knighted by the Queen at Windsor Castle. He had raised almost £40m.
It was a tawdry coda to a story of understated selflessness. But in a demonstration of how the values of an older generation co-exist with more modern and less altruistic mores, Ingram-Moore has come out swinging. Speaking to the BBC, she apologised for setting up the Captain Tom Foundation in her father’s name, which she called her “deepest regret”.
square EMILY WATKINS
Shame on Captain Tom's family – but shame on the rest of us, too
Read MoreIn a characteristically modern twist, Ingram-Moore made an apology-that-wasn’t for this aspect of the affair. “I’m sorry they feel misled, I genuinely am, but there was never any intent to mislead,” she said. It is a favourite formula nowadays: I am sorry that you mistakenly believe I have anything to apologise for. It uses the language of contrition but absolves the speaker of any blame in a strange form of moral gaslighting.
“Here I am as a woman who’s worked predominantly in male-dominated businesses all my life successfully – now nobody thinks that that’s worth anything. It’s devastating.”
The first, to be (self-)published later this year, is entitled Grief: Public Face, Private Loss, and will offer “insights from my personal journey” to help others “navigate emotions and honour loved ones” (though not, presumably, through the establishment of charitable foundations). This will be followed by a book on resilience, which she certainly does not lack, and an autobiography will complete the trilogy in 2026.
It is a seedy microcosm of the seamier side of contemporary Britain. Ingram-Moore is undone by haters, and she is sorry that they have misunderstood her. Shame is not just dead, it has been taken out in a professional hit and its body dumped on waste ground. What she wants is modern life’s most valuable prize and route to salvation: being the victim.
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