Survivor 48
Let's start with something simple. Give me your name, age, and occupation.[Sarcastically.] That's simple. [Laughs.] That's three whole things! My name is Kamilla. I'm 30, almost 31; I'll be 31 a week after filming. And I am a software engineer. Was computer science something you always wanted to do?It started off as I played a lot of video games as a child, and I wanted to make video games. But then I found out that regular software engineering is where the money is at, not game dev. Although if I won a million dollars, I probably quit my job and then try and make a game on my own. It's just I don't have the time during the day. All my eight hours are spent making an app for gamers.Do you have a dream game you'd like to make?I brought my Switch with me, of course, and so I've been playing lots of Stardew Valley. And right now my brain is only on farming sim, farming sim, farming sim. But I love games like open-world, survival, crafting sort of stuff. Valheim was a great game. I'd love to make something like that. Which is crazy, it's silly, because it's kind of like Survivor! I didn't put that together! [Laughs.]I was about to say this is basically open-world crafting if you'd like to do that! Listen, there's definitely a history of Survivor video games. But, with no offense, it's not the strongest. So you can be a game changer, quite literally!I never put those two together. Survivor is the only TV show I watch. I don't really watch TV. I don't watch movies. I'd rather be playing games instead if I had to sit still for an hour and a half. But yeah, the games I play are this type of survival crafting stuff.Talk to me about that. What's your history with watching Survivor?So I started watching Survivor, I think I must have been nine or so. It was an adult TV show that I wasn't allowed to watch. I was only allowed to watch cartoons when I was younger. But my mom was watching these shows, and we just weren't allowed to join her until, I guess, The Amazon. So I started watching partway through The Amazon. And like I said, it's an adult TV show. Maybe the second or third episode I watch, they're at an endurance challenge. And people start stripping for peanut butter. I'm like, "Oh God! The one adult show is gonna get ripped away from me." But thankfully, my mom was okay with it. I continued to watch after that. I did drop off at a certain point, because in high school, I was like, "I'm too cool for TV. I'm only playing video games because that's cooler." And so I missed a couple of seasons in between, and then my brother pulled me back in. I went away for college, and I would come home periodically. And he's like, "You need to start watching Survivor again. This man is going to win the entire game." And it was Tony, wow. So I started early on. He was like, "This dude is gonna win the entire thing." And I thought he was talking about Spencer, because at the time I was like, "Oh yeah, Spencer seems like a smart kid." And I saw a lot of myself in Spencer. But at the time I was like, "Oh yes, so logical. Oh my God, that's me. I'm so logical." Now, after working with a bunch of software engineers, I realized I am not logical. I'm very, very emotional. I always thought I was. Growing up around the people that I was with, I was always the more logical person. And then once I went out into the big real world, I was like, "Oh shit, nope. There are other people that are way more logical and very less emotional than me."Interesting. So what made you decide to go from watching Tony's antics to hopefully making your own out here on the island?I guess I kind of always wanted to play when I was a kid. Because as a child, the challenges looked fun. And then when I got older and I saw Spencer, I was like, "This little boy genius made it very far interesting. I can do that too. I don't have to be emotional." Because I thought at the time I wasn't emotional. Like, "Oh, then I can get away without doing all the emotional, social stuff, and just play based off of logic." So I wanted to play the game since then. But I'm Canadian, so I couldn't apply for the longest time. Casting for Season 39 comes around, and I'm like, "Oh, I can finally apply!" And I applied, and I heard nothing from it. That was it. I think it was, at the time, if you were Canadian, you had to send an email with your video. And I got the auto-responder. I'm like, "Whoa, oh my god!" But it was just an auto-responder; nothing happened from that. I'm so glad that that Kamilla did not make it on Survivor, because that was the Kamilla who thought she was very logical, and it's just brain, brain, brain, no emotion. So I'm glad that she's gone.And now she's in front of us in a much more fully realized version of herself!Yeah, that was like five, maybe six years ago.You mention previously associating with Spencer. Give me one winner and one non-winner who you identify with the most.So winner, I think Erika, and that's just based off of what we were born with and what we're given. We're short, we're over 30, but we're kinda are a bit childish. The way I speak is not very intelligent. I don't have a large vocabulary. I sound stupid when I talk. My sentences are very short. And so I'm very unthreatening. People usually underestimate me. And I think that's kind of what Erika talked about in the beginning, when she was just like, "Even at my job, no one listens to me. I'm a 30-something-year-old, and I'm very senior. But I walk into a room, and I don't get the respect I deserve. Because she's short, very childish face. And that's kind of the stuff that I deal with too. But, okay, it's not that great in the real world. But in a game like Survivor, that is a great thing to have. I can run around and do shit, and people don't think I'm threatening. I'm very unassuming. I can get away with shit; people won't think it'sNon-winner, Carolyn. Because she was just completely herself out there. I have come to realize that my strongest friendships are the one where I'm extremely open, and not the ones where I'm censoring myself. That's when I feel the best. And so I want to come out here and just be myself, be the odd individual that I am. And Jeff says it all the time. He's like, "Did Carolyn kind of give you permission to do this?" And honestly, she kind of did. Because, like, when I watched her, when I initially saw her, I was like, "Oh, this lady is crazy, blah, blah, blah." But in all of her confessionals, the way she like, laid out what was happening, I was like, "This is my exact thought process. Am I the crazy lady, or are we both just normal?" And that's what it is. We're both just maybe not normal in the sense of "normy" people. But we're both odd, and that's okay. And that's fine.
What's your favorite moment in Survivor history?There's just tiny, stupid things that are coming to my head. Of course, Natalie Anderson trying to mock someone on that challenge. I think Keith or someone spat out, and she spat. It just came back and hit her on her chest. I feel like, sometimes, that could kind of be me trying to be like, "Yes, look, I'm one of the boys, too." And it's just like, "Kamilla, you're 5'1". Your voice has not dropped. It just never dropped. It's still super high. You're not going to be one of the boys."[Laughs.] What has your preparation been like before getting out here, either physical, mental, strategic, etc.?Strategic has been a lot of just watching the game, watching the more recent seasons over, even though I've already seen them, just to see things that I might have missed on the first watch. Physical, my husband's been dragging me to the gym every single day, and I hate it. But I got muscles now! Initially, I hated it, and I still hate the running and swimming parts. But I found out I like lifting, so that, I hope, will continue when I go back home. And then for survival stuff, that's been a little tricky. Because I live in a place where you can't make fires, California. I think that's a big problem. I definitely haven't been running out at night and going somewhere like a beach and maybe making fire at night, definitely haven't done that. Because that would be breaking the law. And I'm not a citizen, but I am a permanent resident that doesn't break the law.What's one life experience you feel has prepared you most for the game?I think it's just failing. Continuously failing to get to where I want in my career. And would kind of consider where I am right now a failure. Because little girl Kamilla wanted to be a game developer. She's not right now because she's sidetracked. And he end goal is to still be a game developer. I just need to set myself up better to do that. But I failed every step of the way. I didn't get into the right college program. I got into an alternate because I was too stupid to get into the right program. I'm not a software engineer. I didn't go to school for that. And then I was like, "Okay, first year, I'm gonna transfer into software engineering." And then again, too stupid for that. I was like, "Okay, maybe I can find some internships if I just try and teach it to myself." And I did, but I failed to convert any of those to full-time jobs. And then everyone in college–not everyone, all the boys who studied computer science and software engineering–told me, "There's no point in trying. You're gonna graduate with an industrial engineering degree. Dn't bother. You're not gonna become a software engineer. You just can't." And so I'm a very spite-driven, spite-motivated individual. So I was like, "F–k it. I'm gonna keep going." Didn't get the job I wanted initially. But somehow, a company took a chance on me when I was very underqualified. Here I am! And I've been like, at this place for six years, and it's been great. I mean, it's game adjacent, not game dev.I think there's this idea that, with a few exceptions, Survivor never goes perfectly for anyone. And it's about having your mind conditioned to that inevitability, and then focus on how you recover. It's a healthy perspective.Yeah, I guess every time I failed, I didn't let myself stop and mourn about it. I was just like, "Okay, what's next? I still want to get there. Given where I am now, what can I do to still get there and still be successful?" And I think that's what I need for Survivor.Give me your biggest superpower and your biggest piece of kryptonite when it comes to this game.I'll start with kryptonite, because that one's easy. I'm very impatient. Well, good news, because it's a 26-day game.Yeah, but f–k, that one's gonna be hard to keep it to myself and not explode on my tribemates. That could be a little difficult.Is that impatience you feeling someone isn't doing something quickly enough? Or are you more so talking about you finding an idol, then immediately wanting to tell someone?It's usually other people are too slow. It's horrible. But I find that people talk too slow most of the time, which is why I don't watch any videos. I don't listen to podcasts about Survivor. I just read all the transcripts because I'm like, "I can't. This is too slow. Just let me read it faster." I'm very impatient. And so it could be like, if we're trying to figure out who to vote, and someone just needs more help getting to the point, that can be a little frustrating for me. So that might be a little difficult.Are you gonna be one of those people at Tribal Council that's like, "Jeff, can we vote?"I might be. I'm just like, "This is too much talking. People are starting to say things that I don't want them to be saying. Some people don't know how to shut their mouths, and they're saying too much to Jeff right now. We need to vote."Listen, there's precedent for that. What about superpower?Superpower, I think, is being underestimated. Because I looked around at everyone here. I'm definitely the shortest person here. All my Uber drivers are like, "Are you coming home from school?" I'm like, "I'm not. I'm about to be 31. I'm old!" So I think that will be my superpower. I mean, it's like a double-edged sword. People think there's not much going on here. Maybe I'm not threatening. Maybe that hurts me in the end. But I am confident in my ability to talk my way out of things. So I think it's a superpower, and not the other.Related: Everything to Know About Survivor 48
Next, check out our interview with Survivor 48 contestant David Kinne.
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