Survivor 48
To start, give me your name, age, and occupation.My name is Mary Zheng. I'm 30 years old, and I'm a social worker. Right now, I'm working with substance abuse counseling. But I've done a lot of crisis intervention, for example, working at crisis hotlines, working in emergency departments, working in winter time emergency homeless shelters. But right now, working with substance abuse counseling in Philadelphia.How did you get into social work?I feel like I was always called to do social work. I didn't realize it, though, until one year I spent hitchhiking, backpacking alone around the Mediterranean. And every country that I went to, there were people who told me their secrets and then ended up saying, "Wow, I've never told that to anybody. I feel so much better now." And me thinking, "You know what? I feel great too." That was such an experience for me. So I came back from that, and I realized, "I think a therapist gets to get paid to do this, to, listen to people's secrets and help them see their strengths." So then I did Peace Corps and some other things that I wanted to do before launching into my career. I did AmeriCorps as well. So I've kind of been doing social work way before I got my Master's in social work.And have you always specialized in substance abuse counseling?Substance abuse counseling is new for me. I started that right after grad school. But I have had personal experiences with people that I've cared about who have suffered from substance abuse. I know what it's like when they're talking about, "Yeah, I was doubled over in pain. It's the worst thing that you could ever imagine." I'm like, "I was on the other side."Well, let's go from Habitat for Humanity to building a very different habitat for a specific humanity. What made you want to play Survivor?I was looking for a way to make money. Because my mom was really stressed, really, really stressed about money, so much so that she didn't want to attend happy family gatherings, because she wasn't in the mood. She was stressed, because my parents are political asylees and forced to immigrate to the US. But anyway, to supplement that, I was looking for a way to make money. But also, I love the show.There are easier ways to make money!There are easier ways to make money, for sure. But I mean, you factor that in the necessity to make some money, but then also my love for adventure and love for the show. It's so f–king crazy. It's both exactly like real life and real-life amplified times 101. Like in real life, if you don't have connections, you're not gonna get anywhere. And I don't just mean career-wise. I mean in terms of satisfying your soul and finding meaning, right? It's all about connections, and it's like that on the island. But also out here, the name of the game is deception. And I don't lie at all in real life; that shit lowers your energy so much I made a rule to not even try to white lie. But out here, it's the exact opposite. So I'm so fascinated by this game and the ways that it is so much like my normal life, and exactly opposite and nothing that I could ever experience other than coming out here and playing it. And I've done a lot of crazy stuff in my life, but not for a while. I mean, I went to grad school; I started setting down roots in Philly. And it's really been a while since I've gone out there, done something that's scary, and challenged myself. And that's another reason why I'm out here is because I feel like, unlike my parents, I don't have a Communist regime coming after me. I've never faced incarceration. I'm not facing any oppression from the government. And I want to be pushed to see what my limits are.Yeah, you got settled into a routine–lovingly so. And sometimes it's good to shake it up, if only to give you appreciation for that routine.You need to shake it up. I need to shake it up.So what's your history with Survivor?My history with watching the show is not as long as some people's. But it started during COVID. I started watching during COVID. I don't really watch TV. But when I am watching TV, it's Survivor. Because I feel like I want to be living my life out there, not in front of a screen. And so, I'm not ashamed to say that I'm not out there watching TV all the time. But when I am watching TV, it's Survivor. And initially, what I loved about the show was–well, what made me think that I could do it. I was watching all the water challenges in Heroes vs. Villains, and I thought to myself, "You know, what? Who are these people? They're choking out there. I feel like I could do so much better."I love this idea that you were like, "Here are some of the best players in Survivor history. God, they're terrible swimmers."They're terrible swimmers. They're amazing strategists. But with swimming, I feel like I could beat them. And so that was initially what sparked my interest in it. It made me think maybe I could do it. And then as I watched more of the show, I realized it's about reading people as much as it is about getting people to trust you, and I'm really good at both.Give me one winner and one non-winner who you identify with the most.I really identify with Ben. I really identify with him, because he was just always o. He had this fierce desire to win at all costs. And I feel like that is what I'm gonna be like when I'm out there playing. Yeah, I'm gonna be sleeping. But am I really sleeping? Or am I dreaming up strategies? And also, I'm hoping that I get to play like him in that I am a spy. I want to do some espionage.[For non-winner], I mean, Kaleb's time was cut way too short. But I feel like I would be someone like him on the island, where everybody would just be like, "Damn, she's kind of friends with everybody." Because I feel like that's one of my powers, is that I can turn even enemies into friends, just give me long enough.Where does that come from? The power of persuasion? Charm?Honestly, killing it with kindness and persistence. Persistently showing love and being kind, so that whatever this person's got going on with them, they realize that, "Oh, you know what? She did remind me of somebody that I hated. But actually, she's really different, and she's nothing like what I expected, and I'm down to give her a chance."Give me your biggest superpower and your biggest piece of kryptonite when it comes to this game.I think my kryptonite with this game is also my strength. My strength and my weakness are one and the same. It's that I play a really good social game, and people are gonna smell that from a mile away.So your work is all about helping others in need, and that works to a certain extent in Survivor as well. But how will that work with the individualism of needing to cut somebody to get one step closer to the million dollars?That's something that I've been working on for maybe about four or five years, which is learning how to say no to other people so that I can say yes to myself. Because, I mean, my dad's a political martyr. My mom is the sole breadwinner for our family. They're both putting themselves last. And, of course, that's how I grew up, thinking that "It's good to eat last. That's what you should do." But I've done things for people that you know because I didn't want to hurt their feelings. For example, this one girl in Morocco. I love her so much; she welcomed me into her family. But I spent like $3,000 helping her with an illegal abortion, and I only had like $9,000 out for myself traveling. And by the end of that, I feel like I kind of became her protector and her bank and everything all rolled in one, and it really tarnished our relationship. And I realized, "You know what, Mary? You can't give endlessly. You have to learn to give to yourself as well." And so I've been trying to put myself first when I can in real life for a while now. And I feel like this experience is gonna be the ultimate test.You want to open doors for people, but not be the doormat.Exactly. And I wanna open doors, but I also wanna learn how to shut them too. And just be like, "You know what? This is my room. This is my space. Sorry, you can't come in. Because I need to be in here if I wanna win a million."
What's your favorite moment in Survivor history?What the heck? That is a crazy question. [Pause.] This was wild. When Denise got Sandra out, that was f–king crazy. That was f–king crazy. And then afterward, when Sandra was offered the chance to stay and play the game, she was like, "I'm good. I don't have anything to prove. I am the queen, and I know my worth. And I'm gonna leave this game for people, for my predecessors, to pick up." The whole thing was just crazy. I mean Sandra had, I feel like, an uncharacteristic moment of weakness in which she led with her heart rather than her head. And Denise just snuck in there and just decimated her like that. For Sandra to be so uncharacteristically emotional, for Denise to sneak in at the perfect moment, and then for Sandra to just so gracefully accept defeat, I think that was one of the greatest moments on Survivor.What's one life experience you feel has prepared you most for the game?I think volunteering at a crisis hotline where 25% of the calls were suicide-related really prepared me. Because you have to get someone to trust you within moments of speaking to them for the first time. And you also never know what's gonna happen, what call you're gonna get. You don't know if somebody has already swallowed two bottles of Benadryl, or if they have a gun to their head. That was one of the first calls I got from my training. This guy was like, "How are you?" And I'm like, "Good. How are you?" And he's like, "I got a gun to my head." And I'm like, "Alight, why don't we just put that down on the table." So you have to keep your calm. You have to be able to pivot and embrace chaos. I think that that helps keep me grounded. There's also this idea of handling people when they're acting out of emotion rather than logic. And, considering the deprivational elements of Survivor, that seems like something you'll absolutely encounter out here.Yeah, definitely. I'm already imagining myself talking an alliance member off a cliff and being like, "We don't need to do that. We can wait. Revenge is best served cold."You wrote in your bio that you have "a hunger for control." Tell me more about that.Yeah, so that's also something that I've been working on as well. Because overgiving is linked to a desire for control, a hunger for control. When you overgive, when I would do it, it was an unconscious attempt to assert control. Because when you give, when you're the hand that feeds, you are in power. I mean, I grew up in an environment where that control from my parents was necessary. They were in a foreign land. They didn't have time to learn the language, customs, cultures. Everything was different. And so I was able to learn how to keep things under control. But because I realized that this control was kind of making me feel safe, but it wasn't actually setting me free, I decided to try to learn how to overcome that. So that was when I set out to hitchhike and backpack–not with a big backpack, but a really normal-sized backpack–around the Mediterranean with no plans at all. I got so good at it that some nights, I'd be hitchhiking and end up in a city that I didn't intend to go to. Where I didn't know anyone, my phone was on like 2%, it would be 8:00 p.m., and I didn't know where I was staying that night. So I got really good at just, going with the moment and trusting that I was not gonna die. That's my bottom line. If I'm not gonna die, I'm good.Where did your parents emigrate from, if I may ask?From China. My parents were involved in the 1989 Tiananmen Square demonstrations. They helped organize it. So my mom was in charge of the press and the paper that was circulating along the square, and my dad helped lead the hunger protests. They were the older intellectuals who were guiding the students and the student-led movement. But because of their involvement, my mom was incarcerated for nine months, and my dad, there was a nationwide search for him. He was on the most wanted list. There were pictures of his face in every major city. So, after my mom was released, she escaped house arrest. And with the help of all kinds of people, from religious people to sex workers to police, my mom and my dad were able to reunite. From there, they escaped and were smuggled on a boat to Hong Kong, where they then received political asylum in the U.S.Wow. And so I would imagine you've had this attitude fostered in you to speak up for what you feel is right.Absolutely. And to not care what people think. And then also to make something out of my life. To push myself and to try to squeeze every last drop out of life that I can. And I feel like that's what I'm doing now. Let's talk about your competition. Who are you picking up good vibes from in the preseason?So there's this taller Black guy with kind of like a fro. Not really, but maybe one inch. And every time the servers take his food, he says, "Thank you," and either does like a praying motion, or puts his hand on his heart. And I'm like, "You know what? He seems like, a very, very sweet boy." And yeah, I would be down to play with him. There is the gay guy with the mustache. He just reminds me when my friends at home. He's been really kind to me as well. Because even though we can't talk, I mean, you can feel people's energy. You can feel when they are happy to see you or find you amusing when you do something on accident, stuff like that. I would also really like to work with this one. I think he's Asian, he's tanner. He's maybe mid-30s or something. He and I, I think, have in common that we have rich inner landscapes. Because everyone out here is journaling to some capacity. But when you look at most people's journals, it's like the first three pages. They literally got a journal because they were like, "Well, I'm gonna be out here. I want to process and learn and discover about things about myself." But [with] me and this guy, our journals are almost done, which means we actually journal in everyday life. That's something that I've been doing since I was 17, almost every day. So I feel like, if I were to work with someone like him, he'd be thoughtful. And I think he would really think things through, and I would appreciate that in an alliance partner.Is that the core tenet you're seeking in an alliance member?I'm kind of in alignment with that. It's also that I need someone who is going to lead with their head and not their heart. You can't be that Sandra. You can't let that moment of weakness get you because you need to play with your heart. But, I mean, I trust myself to play with the balance. But I would rather trust someone else who leads with their head. Because I don't want someone blowing up our cover or spreading secrets because they're ticked off about someone and then that blowing up our entire game.Anyone you're picking up red flags from?I would say that it's hard for me to get a read on this one girl who sits in front of me. She has dark hair, a lot of hair. It's really thick. I'm actually kind of jealous. I'm like, "Dang, I wish I had that hair!" But it's hard for me to read on her. She reminds me of some people who I've met in my life who judge me for being loud or chaotic and thinking that I'm only one-dimensional and that I don't have deeper thoughts.Related: Everything to Know About Survivor 48
Next, check out our interview with Survivor 48 contestant Kevin Leung.
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